Lana Del Ray: What Happens When You Listen to Chris Issak's 'Wicked Game' Over & Over

The first I'd ever heard of chanteuse, Lana Del Ray, was the day after he supposed disastrous a appearance on SNL as the night's featured music act.  From what I understand, her live performance did not live up to the expectations her debut album, Born to Die, had created months earlier. 

Oh, well.

So, I waited. Still being accused of being stuck in the 90s with my music, I decided to take a step into the here and now, carefully treading past the any 'artist' with the moniker "Lil'" prefacing their stage name. It's music not crafted for my 41 year old ears, therefore, I leave it for the younger audience.

One day, I was played "Born to Die" and was immediately intrigued. Who is this Lana Del Ray? I downloaded her album and to my surprise, discovered a kaleidoscope of sound, delivery and authenticity. I would venture so far out to even call her the first genuine and successful attempt at mashing what has been referred to for generations as "Black" and "White" music.

She is a mix of rap/hip hop, Mylene Farmer's ethereal whisp, Tori Amos' sincerity all wrapped up in the embodiment of a Vassar girl.

For the first few weeks, I couldn't stop listening to the album.  Sure, she rips others off  pays homage to earlier artists (the entire album is a variation on Chris Isaak's 'Wicked Game') but she pulls it off delicately and with brilliance. 

I love this girl. 

Couldn't have had a lovelier welcome to today's sound if I wanted one.

'Can We All Get Along?' Rest In Peace, Rodney King

Prometheus: A Film Review Starting with 'Alien', Ad Nauseam.

I initially wanted to begin this review with the luminous background of director Ridley Scott's  career, but it has simply been done to death. We know he's the innovator whose bleak, film noir look of the future launched a thousand rip-offs. With the help of visionary artist H.R. Giger, who seems to never get any love.

For decades after 'Alien', true lovers of the film, not the franchise, have wondered aggravatingly about certain scenes early in the film.  The "Space Jockey" was the subject that kept fanboys in debates and nerdy chatrooms ablaze, all offering wrong theories.

Now, with the help of a scribe from J.J. Abrams & Co., we get the answers to not only what it was, but the origin of the alien species itself.


*****************  SPOILER ALERT *******************


20th Century Fox produced 'Prometheus', the pseudo-cousin cum prequel to 'Alien' for a reported $200 million and you see every penny on screen. Roger Ebert said it best when writing that the 3-D effects are some of the best and most appropriately used for any film. Opting to use it as a visual layer offering depth other than cheap theatrics and scares. "Oh, no! The monster is jumping out of the screen at me!" The production design of the film is flawless, combining signature Scott looks from the aforementioned 'Alien' as well as 'Blade Runner'.  I can not reinforce how beautiful the film is.

That said, ultimately, it is a long bore. Part of the $200 million dollars obviously went to paying off critics because the plodding of its plot was the most sinister thing about it. The creatures offered contrived scares and gaping plot holes.  Why did the infected astronaut go crazy, killing everyone? The plot is one of the most horribly convoluted scripts ever shot and it's all covered up with beautiful cinematography.  The fact of the matter is, J.J. Abrams & Co. has a problem with depth. That was very apparent with 'Super 8', the deepest film he and the boys have pulled off. It's good, but as a love letter to Spielberg, it's not great, but boy does it try.  'Prometheus' doesn't even try. It simply appears with a ridiculous set up that prompts a crew to travel to the far reaches of the galaxy chasing the ancestral origins of humans.  And in your best In-the-Not-Too-Distant-Future voice, say, "But what they find..............................no one expected." Or cared for that matter.

Noomi Rapace of  The Millennium Trilogy is the film's one saving grace. Everyone else just looked happy to be there. Charlize Theron plays a bitch for the third time in a row. Guess it doesn't help that I'd just seen her days prior in 'Snow White and the Huntsman', so it became Theron on Bitch Mode, Level 8.

The last shot of Rapace's 'Dr. Elizabeth Shaw' flying off in one of the handily available crafts is such a kick in the gut.....I mean, I haven't seen such preening movie critics lying about how good something is since George Lucas released his disastrous Episodes 1 - 3.  Remember those? Walked in like I was ready for the party and walked out like I'd attended a wake.

I think it's safe to say that the 'Alien' franchise is dead. 

Who can wait another 30 years for a decent one?

Why Are You So Fidgety or The Art of Living Down A Past Imperfect

I've heard it all before
I've heard it all before
I've heard it all before
I've heard it all before
[repeat]

I don't wanna hear, I don't wanna know
Please don't say you're sorry
I've heard it all before
And I can take care of myself
I don't wanna hear, I don't wanna know
Please don't say 'Forgive me'
I've seen it all before
And I can't take it anymore

You're not half the man you think you are
Save your words because you've gone too far
I've listened to your lies and all your stories (Listened to your stories)
You're not half the man you'd like to be

I don't wanna hear, I don't wanna know
Please don't say you're sorry
I've heard it all before
And I can take care of myself
I don't wanna hear, I don't wanna know
Please don't say 'Forgive me'
I've seen it all before
And I can't take it anymore

Don't explain yourself 'cause talk is cheap
There's more important things than hearing you speak
You stayed because I made it so convenient (made it so convenient)
Don't explain yourself, you'll never see

Gomen nasais [Japanese. English translation: "I am sorry"]
Mujhe maaf kardo [Hindi. English translation: "Please forgive me"]
Przepraszam [Polish. English translation: "I'm sorry"]
Sli'kha [Hebrew. English translation: "Forgive me"]
Forgive me...

(Sorry, sorry, sorry)
I've heard it all before
I've heard it all before
I've heard it all before
[repeat]

I don't wanna hear, I don't wanna know
Please don't say you're sorry
I've heard it all before
And I can take care of myself
I don't wanna hear, I don't wanna know
Please don't say 'forgive me'
I've seen it all before
And I can't take it anymore

I don't wanna hear, I don't wanna know
Please don't say you're sorry
(Don't explain yourself cause talk is cheap)
I've heard it all before, And I can take care of myself
(There's more important things than hearing you speak)
I don't wanna hear, I don't wanna know
Please don't say 'forgive me'

I've heard it all before
I've heard it all before
I've heard it all before
I've heard it all before
                                                         - Madonna


I'm done apologizing........
                                                      

She's Not Me: Madonna Taunts GaGa

Perhaps it's because Madge hasn't been in the spotlight much since her album, MDNA, topped the Billboard charts (and suffered a subsequent nosedive in sales), but she recently went out of her way to once again remind everyone that she is, in fact, on to Lady Gaga. The queen of pop was performing "Express Yourself" at a rehearsal in Tel Aviv, Israel when she suddenly trotted out a cover of "Born This Way." Of course, the two tracks blended seamlessly. Surprise. Though she stayed mum on Gaga's song for some time after its release, Madge eventually said she felt the single was "reductive" and undoubtedly influenced by her earlier work which it was. The whole affair had an air of condescension, as if Madonna was wielding the cover like Jay-Z did when he silenced Noel Gallagher and other critics by performing "Wonderwall" at Glastonbury. (The Oasis singer had taken great umbrage at the fact that a rapper had been chosen to headline the festival.) Was Madonna rubbing some salt in Gaga's wound (the latter had recently canceled a show after she faced threats from conservative religious groups), or was she merely winking at the controversy while celebrating the younger performer?

We shall await GaGa's response on Glee or So You Think You Can Dance With the Stars.

Or something.

SPOILER ALERT! SPOILER ALERT!

BBC's 'Sherlock' Cast as Villainous Khan in Abrams' 'Star Trek' Follow-up

Filmmaker JJ Abrams has scored an impressive coup, casting his 'Star Trek' sequel's villain.  After negotiations went afoul with Oscar winner Benecio del Toro, the BBC's acclaimed 'Sherlock' star, Benedict Cumberbatch, has signed on to step into the scene-stealing shoes of the late Ricardo Montalban, whose Khan hasbecome one of the most memorable, if not comedically imitated characters in filmdom. 

In Abrams' first trek, the young charactewrs of Captain Kirk's bridge realized they were in an alrternate reality, meaning this isn't a remake, but a new encounter, entirely.

We know Khan tries to kill Kirk and steal the Enterprise.  Hopefully, it will beas much fun the second (third if you count the earlier television episode) time around. 

The yet untitled follow up to 'Star Trek' is slated for a Summer 2013 release.

Madonna's 'MDNA': And That's Okay

It feels like forever since Madonna released anything of relevance.  'Hard Candy', her experiment with young super producers such as Pharrell Williams was pretty much a wash, making a vail attempt to hearken back to her early 'Everybody' roots, yet, failing dismally. Not as dismally as 'American Life'.

In the span of time between the excellent 'Confessions on the Dancefloor' and now, Lady GaGa and Rhianna have become the divas of the moment. And rightfully so Their individual pushes have been properly diverse and obvbious hommages to the self proclaimed Queen of Pop, herself.  There is an unwritten law that states that pop divas can't age and when they do, they are put out to pasture and most of Madonna's criticism comes from so called pop purists who are actually ageists in disguise. Surprisingly enough, most of the criticism is from females! And after everything Madonna has done for women and gays! Remember, GaGa fans, there would be no Monster movement had Madonna not embraced the gay populace in the wake of AIDS along with Elizabeth Taylor.

And now, Madonna is back with the cleverly titled 'MDNA' (the active ingredient found in Ecstasy pills)  and the Queen is fighting mad. Not at GaGa (though there is the playful swipe by featured artist, Nicki Minaj, rap's current bad bitch) or Rhianna, but at ex husband, Guy Ritchie. And it's a deliciously vicious romp.

Eight of  the sixteen tracks take direct aim at Ritchie and even his new pin-up wife, in a onslaught of digs and slams. The best, 'Gang Bang' where Madonna launches into a devilish tirade in the last 45 seconds chanting 'Drive bitch! And while you're at die, bitch!' I can see this being chanted in clubs around the world this summer! God willing! A fitting end to an angry song about being wronged.

LMFAO remixes the first single, 'Give Me All Your Luv', the poppy, cheerleader Katy Perry-esque song that became the first shot fired from her album.

Granted, 'MDNA' becomes increasingly better over several plays, but the hooks are infectious and undeniable, becoming stuck in your brain like any good hook should. This is Madonna in fighting form. Gorgeous, praying, sinning, bad and uncharacteristically pissed the fuck off while being the diva du jour, bad ass reigning diva of music she is.

All you other bitches, ding ding....class is in.